


Avengers One-Shots

by brecsfiction



Category: Avengers, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: American Sign Language, Angry Sex, Angst, Body Paint, Character Death, Dating, Fluff, Friends With Benefits, Hook-Up, Lies, Love/Hate, Masturbation, Nude Modeling, Paparazzi, Scars, Sex, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-19
Updated: 2021-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-28 00:02:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30130923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brecsfiction/pseuds/brecsfiction
Summary: This is me moving (and editing) my Wattpad stories to AO3 because they are explicit.
Kudos: 2





	1. Bucky Barnes | Can Hear Him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cute (slightly angsty) story about a deaf female reader and her not yet boyfriend Bucky being a jealous butt

General POV  
Ever since you met the God of Thunder, you have been close with him. The two of you spent a ton of time together... and that is what made a certain metal-armed man jealous. Bucky couldn't understand what was so great about Thor. Why was the Asgardian so great? He was loud, he was arrogant, and he ate all the Poptarts. 

Bucky had been trying to get closer with you for some time now. All the Avengers knew it. Hell, you knew it. But what he couldn't understand was why you decided to spend all your time with the blonde with a hammer. 

Your POV  
I was hanging out with Thor again. He and I were sitting out on the balcony, talking about what it is like in Asgard. I always found it interesting, listening to him talk. It was something I don't get to do a lot. Because of an accident, I lost a majority of my hearing at a young age. The doctors told me it was moderate hearing loss, we found out that I could hear sounds over 57 decibels. Meaning I can't hear the majority of conversations. 

Hearing aids work, but they are hard to use. And more often than not, I get a headache from them. So talking with Asgardian was the easiest. Well, Clint was also easy to talk to, seeing as he also knows sign language. But he's a sarcastic asshole. And every time he and I start talking he insults me. And because he is signing it to me, I don't get the benefit of Steve yelling language at him.

People may think, 'Oh, all I have to do in order to talk to (Y/n) is yell!' No. Decibels are based on sound energy, look it up. And please don't yell at me. I can't hear you any better if you're yelling. You just look like an asshole yelling at a deaf girl. 

Thor naturally spoke at a higher decibel than most people and that is what made conversations with him easier. It also helps that I can read lips, so if you're having a conversation with me and I'm looking at your lips, NO I DON'T WANT TO KISS YOU PLEASE BACK THE FUCK UP.

Now you may be thinking 'hOw DoEs SoMe OnE wHoS dEaF tAlK?' Well, my meme-worthy friend, the same way you do. I push air through my vocal cords and move my mouth. I was not born deaf. I spoke for almost ten years, so it's muscle memory. Yeah, I may sound dumb, but at least you know what I'm saying. 

"What do you think, Lady (Y/n)?"

"I would love to visit the gardens on Asgard. They sound so beautiful."

"It is a date then! You teach me hand language and I shall bring you to Asgard."

I let out a small laugh, "sign language, Thor. And yes, it's a date."

Thor looks behind you, and lets out a smile, "Ah Brother Barnes! Do not worry about that!"

Turning around I see a very handsome Bucky walk in with a frown on his face. He looks at me like he is expecting an answer. 

"Oh sorry Buck, I don't have my hearing aids in. What did you say?" I say getting ready to read his lips.

"I said, you two are going on a date?"

"Indeed! I am taking Lady (Y/n) to Asgard in exchange for lessons in- what is it called?"

"Sign language," I say with a smile.

"Ah, sign language, that is correct!" The cheery blonde throws his arm around my shoulder giving me a slight squeeze. 

I watched as Bucky tensed up. I could see his metal arm clicking into place. 

"Are you alright Buck?" I ask worriedly about him getting upset over something. He turns his body so that he is angled away from me before saying something. "Bucky, I can't hear you, if something's wrong please tell me."

I watch as he shakes his head and walks away from Thor and me. 

I turn to Thor, "Did I say something?"

"I do not know. I did not think that you said anything of offense," he stands up reaching a hand out to you, "Let us go visit my home!"

I grab onto his hand, and he pulls me close to him before we take off.

Bucky's POV  
"I hate how he is so close with her. She is so beautiful and kind and smart. And he is just a big doofus. What could she possibly like about him? Sure he has more muscle mass than I do, is a prince, can fly, and probably has a big-... fuck maybe I should just give up!"

"First off, language," says Steve sitting across the common room, "secondly... Buck come on. They're just friends. It's so obvious that even I see it. She likes you, but you haven't asked her out."

I groan, "I know, I just- what if she says no?"

"If she says no I'll dye my hair pink," I turn around and see Tony walking across the room into the kitchen.

"That's a big bet to make, Stark," Steve says raising an eyebrow.

"And I don't make bets I won't win. Metal arm needs to grow a pair and ask (Y/n) out already. I sick of hearing him whining about her being around Thor all the time."

"He's right, man up Buck. If you don't ask her out sometime soon, then someone else will," Steve claps his hand on my shoulder, "Not saying that to scare you, just tell you the truth."

Your POV  
I was laughing and jumping around after arriving back from Asgard. I met many amazing Asgardians, and the grounds were so beautiful. 

"Alright, Thor, ready for some lessons?" I ask dragging Thor into my room. 

"I am!"

"Alright, so let's start with the alphabet."

After going through the alphabet a few times, Thor started to get a hang of it. I taught him how to have a few basic conversations. He needed to practice and in order to do so, whenever he saw me in the hallway, he had to sign hello and ask me how I was instead of asking.

He seemed to be happy with the things that he learned and went off to get some Poptarts. Smiling, I grabbed my speaker and plugged in some music, turning up the beats so that I could feel them as I lay on the ground. 

Most people listen to music in order to relax. But not me! I blast the tunes and feel the vibrations through the floor.

I don't feel the knock on my door as I lay there and relax to the music, what makes me finally open my eyes, feeling cold, metallic fingers push hair away from my face and light breathing against my nose and cheeks. When I open my eyes, I see those beautiful blue eyes staring down at me with a smile on his lips.

"Hi Bucky," I smile pushing some of his long brown hair behind his ear. Bucky smiles down at me and presses the pause button on my phone, stopping the vibrations that were going through the floor. 

"How you doin' Doll?" he says looking down at me. 

"M' good," I mutter out before yawning. I watch as the corners of his eyes crinkle as he smiles at me, "I had a lot of fun with Thor today."

And just like that, his face falls. He sits up, allowing in an awkward space between the two of us, and putting up his walls.

"Oh," he scoots back, leaning against the side of my bed, "that's nice."

Sitting up, I cross my legs and lean towards him, "what's wrong Bucky?"

"Nothing Doll. Don't worry about it," he says leaning his head back and looking at the ceiling.

He had been acting like this for a while. Whenever you were talking with Thor, near him, talking about him, hell even being in the same room as Thor causes Bucky to shut down... God, he's such a jealous bastard. I mean for fuck sake just ask me out already!

"James." He looked back at me with wide eyes. I never used his real name unless I was annoyed. "If you have a problem then say it. I'm not dealing with you if you're going to keep acting like this."

He sighs, rubbing the back of his neck, "why do you spend so much time with Thor."

"Because I can hear him. Don't get me wrong, he's a great friend, but the reason I first started hanging out with him was because I could hear him."

"Really?"

"Yes! God, you're so dense sometimes!" I laugh scooting closer to him.

"Why don't you just wear your hearing aids, if talking with people is hard?"

"Oh I don't know Buck, why don't you shove a piece of plastic into your head through your ear and listen to blaring noises that come through because of all the freaky shit in this tower?"

"Point made," he smiles his beautiful smile which only started showing up over the past few months. 

I crawl closer to Bucky, "Now I think you have another question for me."

He blushes and bites his lip before picking up his hands and attempts to sign the similar translation to 'will you go out with me'.

I smile watching him attempt, "no."

"N-no?"

"Nope."

"But I thought that-"

I put my finger to his lips, "Not until you learn how to properly ask me on a date. Because as of right now, you are asking me to go outside with you."

"Oh. Oh," he jumps up, and all I hear from what he yelled while sprinting out the door is "CLINT!!!"

Bonus Content:

"Time to dye your hair Stark!" Yells a very happy Steve.

"That's not fair! They went on a date!!" Tony tells running away from Steve who is carrying a neon pink hair dye box.

"Fuck you and your technicalities! And fuck you Metal arm for your stupid ass not knowing how to sign!"

"Language!"


	2. Steve Rogers | Hidden Scars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and a female reader go on a vacation and a mission but reader is hiding something from her boyfriend

You had to stop, It was just too hot, and you were sweating too much. Your stomach was twisting in knots and it felt like you were going to vomit. Scratch that- you were going to vomit. You pulled back from the little competition between yourself, the two supper soldiers and Sam, and heaved into a nearby trash can.

"You okay Doll?" Asked Steve, your boyfriend of almost a year, running over to you. He started rubbing circles on your back and pushed the hair near your face behind your ears.

You heaved again, before nodding slightly. Pulling away from the trash, you tried to stand up but Steve brought you over to a shaded spot in the grass and sat you down.

Bucky finished his lap before coming over to check up on you, "You okay?"

"It seems that she's overheated," Steve says handing you his water bottle.

"She wouldn't be so hot if she actually wore summer workout gear," panted a tired Sam, "I mean who wears a long sleeve shirt and pants on such a hot day?" Taking small sips of water, you flip Sam off. He just laughs and sits beside you.

You had been an Avenger for a few years now, recruited for your skills, skills that were similar to Natasha's. You had no special powers or suits, but you were good at infiltration. Meaning you were a good undercover agent.

"How you feeling Doll?" Steve asks again, pressing his hand to your forehead.

"I'm fine," you say, "don't worry about me. Go run, I'm just going to sit for a minute."

Sam looks at his phone hearing a beep, "no can do. We're wanted in the briefing room. It's mission time."

The four of you go back to the tower, and head into the briefing room where the rest of the team was. The mission was simple. You and Steve would pose as a newly married couple on your honeymoon in Aruba.

During the next week, you will be there to gather information on one of the guests who would be staying there. This mission was solely recon and posed almost no threat.

After packing a bag, you and Steve were on your way to the airport. Going through the airport is always stressful, but the moment that makes everything worse is when the lady cop in security decides she has to pat him down. Thoroughly. Like very thoroughly. Once through, Steve sat you down and rubbed circles into your back, giving you small forehead kisses to calm you down.

You find yourself and Steve on a plane on your way to the beautiful island. The flight was five hours long, and the two of you spent the whole time cuddling on the plane. You took this opportunity to show Steve some of the movies he missed during his time in the ice. On the plane, there was a couple of movie options and in the end, you watch some of the Disney classics.

When the plane landed, you got your bags and took a cab to your hotel. Once you arrived at the Ritz-Carlton, a beautiful five-star hotel, you both went up to your room and unpacked.

You were standing on the balcony, overlooking the ocean when you felt a strong pair of arms wrap around your waist  
You were standing on the balcony, overlooking the ocean when you felt a strong pair of arms wrap around your waist.

"The target isn't going to be here for another few days," Steve says nuzzling his nose into your neck. You could feel his beard lightly scratching, "let's have some fun." He spun you around, planting a kiss on your lips. You wrapped your arms over his shoulders and lean into the kiss. His hands held onto your waist, pulling you in closer before traveling to your butt and squeezing slightly. The action caused you to moan into his mouth and he slipped his tongue in.

Picking you up, he brought you inside and lay you down on the king-sized bed. Hovering over your body, he ran his hands along your sides. His hands lower from beside your ribs down to your hips and his thumbs gently rub the skin under the hem of your blouse. Slowly, he starts to grind his hips against yours. You could feel him start to harden against you.

His lips traveling from your own, across your jaw, and down your neck leaving soft kisses in their wake. You're panting at this point, raking your hands through his soft blonde hair as he presses his growing hard-on against you. His hands move further down, rubbing across your jean-clad thighs. Grimacing, you push him off of your body and right yourself.

"What's wrong?"

"N-nothing!" You yelp, getting off the bed, "We should go eat. I'm so hungry!"

He stares at you, brows furrowed before letting out a small groan of frustration, "Alright."

"Thanks, baby," you smile, pressing your lips softly to his. You grab your things, letting him have a few minutes alone in the bathroom, then head down to the poolside cafe for an early dinner. You both ate some pasta, talking about how beautiful the weather was and how nice it was to have some time together. You finish your meals, the two of you decided to go on a beach walk.

"Ah, the sand feels so nice!" You sequel, jumping around with a huge smile on your face.

"Wait a minute. I have to take my shoes off!" Laughs Steve. Once he takes his shoes off, he chases after you, picking you up and spinning you around. Putting you down, he engulfs your hand in his own and kissing your fingers, "You're so beautiful Doll."

Blushing, you wrap yourself around his arm and lean your head on him, "you to Stevie."

You walk hand in hand down the beach, watching the sunset. He started telling stories about his time in the '40s. About how Bucky would come and save him from the bigger guys, how as kids they would go down to the festivals on the peer and eat their weight in saltwater taffy. Or how Bucky always tried to set Steve up with a girl.

"That seems to still be true," you laugh thinking about how Bucky practically forced you two on a date.

"Yeah, I'm grateful to him though. He's what got me through some hard times." The two of you sat down on the beach and watched the waves and the sunset. "When my mom passed, I thought that was it. That my life was over, I didn't know what to do with myself. I was a skinny kid from Brooklyn, no one wanted to be around me. And I don't blame them." You leaned against his chest and snuggled into his warmth as a cool breeze passed by. "But he kept me going. Kept me from becoming a hermit, locked up alone in my apartment." Steve kissed the top of your head, "I admire him so much. That's part of the reason I volunteered to take the serum, so I could be like him."

"I know that time was rough for you, and I know it's not been a walk in the park getting used to the 21st century, but I'm so glad you are here with me. I don't know where I would be without you," You say, letting a few tears slip out, "I wouldn't be alive if it weren't for you."

"Don't give yourself the short end of the stick, love. You have saved me on the battlefield more than once." He gives you a squeeze before standing up, "Come on Doll, let's get you inside."

Once in your hotel room, and you grab your nightwear and a small bag from your suitcase and go into the bathroom. You lock the door and sit down, laying out the contents of your bag on the countertop beside the sink. Taking off your jeans, you look at the bandages covering your thighs. Slowly unwrapping the material, you look at the cuts that line your flesh. One after the other, they become viable as the bandage is taken off. 7 lines all fairly new, cut into the flesh.

You wrap the bandages in paper and throw them out so that Steve won't find them in the morning. Taking out some cotton balls, you soak them in disinfectant before cleaning out the cuts. You made sure to clean out the wounds, re-wrap your thighs, and fasten the bandage before putting on your night pants. Grabbing the small pill bottle from the bottom of the bag, you take out two small tablets, popping them in your mouth, and swallowing.

When done, you send off a quick text to Tony and plug in your phone. Then throw your worn clothes in the hamper and slide under the covers with Steve.

"I love you (Y/n)," he says pulling you against his chest.

You lay there for a while, listening to his breath even out in his sleep, and soon sleep consumes you, too.

The next morning you are woken up to the smell of breakfast and a soft kiss on the forehead. Stretching your arms over your head you open your eyes to see a freshly showered Steve smiling down at you.

"Morning," you mumble.

"Good morning Doll. Sleep well?"

"Yeah, like a baby," you sit up, noticing a breakfast cart sitting in front of the bed, "did you order room service?"

"Yep. Waffles and bacon. I also got you some fruit."

"You're the best!" You squeal, giving him a huge hug.

"Eat your breakfast love, it's going to get cold."

You eat breakfast on the balcony, making small talk, and watching the amazing view.

"Do you wanna go down to the beach doll?" Steve asks, finishing his omelet.

"Yeah, sure. Let's clean up then we can change and head down."

After putting everything back on the cart, and putting it outside your hotel room door, you grab a bathing suit, a cover-up, and your small bag and go into the bathroom, locking the door.

"You know you can change in-front of me doll," Steve laughs from outside the bathroom door, "I have some self-control."

"Well maybe I don't," you laugh.

"Fuck-"

Letting out a giggle, you reply, "Language!" You giggle before taking off your sleep pants. Following your regular maintenance routine, you clean out the cuts but put on skin color, waterproof bandages instead of your normal ones. You then brush your teeth and rinse off your face before putting on a black bathing suit and an ankle-length floral cover-up.

Opening up the door, you see Steve wearing his navy blue swim trunks and a grey muscle shirt that seemed a bit too small for him.

"Ready?" You ask, throwing your bedclothes into the hamper and grabbing a beach bag, and place in a bottle of sunblock and a book. You turn to look at your boyfriend.

"Remember what I said about self-control?" He smirks looking you up and down, before putting his hands on your hips and pulling your ass against him.

"Down Soldier," you giggle, "let's go."

You both walk to the elevators and head down the beach. After settling on two beach chairs you grab the bottle of sunblock and motion for Steve to sit in front of you, "sunblock time baby."

He does as you say and sits in front of you, taking off his muscle shirt. He relaxes as you rub the lotion on him. Touching him is always a treat, his muscles are just so nice and firm. You spend more time than needed just massaging his back and shoulders.

"As much as I love you touching me, if you keep it up I might not be able to keep it down," he moans softly.

You lightly slap him on his shoulder, "well then finish putting on sunblock then cool yourself off in the water."

Turning around, he motions for me to give him to bottle, "your turn."

"I can do my own, thank you very much."

"That's not fair!" He wines, "I let you touch me all you wanted, but I don't get to touch you?"

"Nope."

He flops down on his back against the chair, "I might need to take a dip in the water after all..."

Leaning over him, you press a chaste kiss to his lips and start applying sunblock to your face. Rolling off the chair, he gets up and heads over the water. You watch him as he jumps in and floats for a minute before shaking his hair out and coming back towards where you were sitting.

"Feel better?" You asked watching as the water dripping off of his body.

"Much," He plops down in his chair and smiles at you, "really, though. You should put some on. I don't want that beautiful skin of yours to burn."

"Since when has Captain America ever been so sappy?" You whisper to him so that no one else could overhear.

"Since I started dating you."

Rolling your eyes you pull out your book and start reading. About halfway through the book and several hours later, you look over to find Steve napping. With a smile, you sit up and move the umbrella so he is no longer in the sun. You also put his sunglasses on after reapplying sunscreen to his face and shoulders.

Noticing that it was a little bit after lunchtime, you call over one of the servers riding a Segway. It was kind of funny looking, but the guy who came by was really nice. You decided to order Steve and yourself lunch so that when he woke up he could eat. You decided on a grilled cheese sandwich and a strawberry-banana smoothie for yourself and fish and chips for Steve with the same drink.

Once the server left, you reapplied your sunblock before heading down to the water to stick your feet in. It was a nice refresher. You watched as some kids splashed around in the water, smiling as they goofed around. You smiled to yourself before heading back to where Steve was and pulled out your phone to check social media a bit.

Not much drama has occurred over the past few days in the Avengers Tower, but there were rumors about Nat being pregnant. People zooming in on her stomach in pictures and trying to figure out who the father is. Shit like this is annoying like these people know nothing about Nat. The media likes to make assumptions about her without even knowing anything.

You decide to send Nat a quick text.

You: Hey, I saw the posts. Ignore them. You know that they are just looking for drama.

Natasha: Thanks, it's funny though. I can't even get pregnant. Also, I lost weight? Whatever though.

You: Ik but text me if you need anything <3

Natasha: Will do

You put your phone away as the server comes up with your food. You thank him and put the food on your chair. You sit on the edge of Steve's chair and start peppering kissing his forehead, cheeks, and nose in an attempt to wake him up. "It's time to wake up sleepy," you say pressing a soft kiss to his lips, "I got us food baby."

He opens his eyes, and sits up, "what time is it?"

"Almost 1:30."

"Oh, sorry. I was asleep for too long..."

"Don't worry about it," you say playing with his hair, "I put more sunblock on you so you wouldn't burn. I also got us lunch if you're hungry."

"I love you so much."

"I know," you smile and grab his lunch and hand it to him before eating your own.

The two of you watch the ocean and the people in it for a while and eat your lunch before calling it a day and heading back inside.

"I'm covered in sand and sun lotion. I'm gonna take a shower," you say, taking out clothes from your bag.

Grabbing my hips and pulling me against him, he moans into my ear, "Mmm can I join you?"

"Nuh-uh Mr," you laugh, "you've been hanging out with Tony too much."

Steve rolls his eyes and sits on the chair turning on the TV. While you go into the bathroom. You lock the door, giving off the click sound.

"You don't need to lock it," Steve grumbles, "You said no. I'm not going to do anything you don't want me to."

After showering and blow-drying your hair, you put on a flowy maxi-dress and step out of the bathroom. "I was thinking we could go to the shopping center. I looked it up while we were at the beach and it seems like a lot of fun."

"Sure," Steve says before going into the shower.

You plop down in front of a mirror and start doing some light makeup when you hear the water turn on.

After a minute of running water, you start hearing Steve breathing heavily. His breath coming out in pants and soon enough you start to hear muffled groans. His breathing started speeding up and soon enough a grunt was released before he went quiet.

You were blushing fiercely at this point. Knowing that Steve was there having just gotten off did a lot to your body.

The water turned off and the door opened, revealing a towel-clad Steve.

He went to his suitcase and grabbed some clothes and faced away from you before starting to change.

You turned back to the mirror and finishing your makeup, taking much longer than usual.

"Almost ready doll?" Steve asks coming up behind you and rubbing your shoulders gently. He was dressed in khakis and a light blue and white plaid button-up shirt rolled up to his elbows, which was as always a bit too small for him.

"Almost. Let me just pack a bag," You stand up and throw some necessities into a small bag.

You leave the hotel and get into a cab, headed off to the shopping center. During the car ride, Steve grabbed your hand and gave it a small squeeze. The cab ride there was short, and he paid the cab driver before getting out. The plaza that the shopping center was in was quite beautiful. There was a lot of intricate architecture. You watched as Steve's face lit up at the sight, he really was an art nerd. The two of you walked around for a few hours, and soon the sun was setting.

As you walked by an ice-cream stand Steve pulled you to a stop, "You want some ice-cream doll?"

"Yes!" You jumped up and down. Steve smiled and brought you over to the ice-cream stand.

"What flavor doll?"

"Mmmm could I have Cookies and Cream please?" You ask the lady behind the stand.

"Of course, here ya' go sweat cheeks. What would you like handsome?"

"Vanilla please," Steve says while looking down at a very happy you. The lady hands Steve his ice-cream and he pays, walking you off to sit down on the ledge of a water fountain. "How is it doll?"

"Soh guud" you say with a big bite of ice cream in your mouth. You both finish your ice cream before deciding to eat a bunch of snacks around the plaza instead of a proper dinner. Running around you both eat whatever you could find. You went into the shops and looked around at the different items.

While in a clothing store, Steve called you over, motioning to a dress, "you would look amazing in this dress doll." The dress was a dark purple sleeveless flare dress that stopped mid-thigh. It was a beautiful dress but you knew that you wouldn't be able to wear it without showing your not so pretty thighs.

"It's beautiful, but I don't think it would look good on me," you say looking around for something to distract Steve with. "Look at this! Er- Snow globe..."

"Yeah, it's nice. I still think that you would look amazing in that dress. Will you try it on for me?"

"No, I don't think it's in my size," you say laughing awkwardly.

"Nonsense. Try it on? Please doll?" He flashes you his beautiful smile with his puppy-dog eyes.

"I can't Steve."

"Why not?"

You bite your lip trying to think, "I'm not wearing the right underwear," you say blushing.

"Oh, well alright," He puts the dress back. The two of you leave the store and head to the hotel. A short cab ride and you were back. "Let's grab a drink."

"But you can't get drunk?"

"I'm gonna try," he mutters under his breath. He pulls you along with him to the nearest bar. Ordering your drinks you sit at the bar in silence. You were sipping your long island iced tea watching as Steve downed beer after beer after beer.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," he says throwing back another glass.

For nearly twenty minutes you watch Steve down alcohol, "Steve, you should stop. I know you don't get drunk but this has to be bad for your liver."

"If I want to blow out my liver then so help me I will. No woman is going to tell me what to do."

You stare at him for a moment in shock, "I'm going to go back to the room. Feel free to join me when you stop being an asshole," you say storming off.

The elevator ride up to your room was filled with questions, one being what the hell is wrong with him? Why is he trying to get drunk? And why the hell was he treating you like it was in the 1940's? You didn't know, but when he got this upset, there wasn't a lot that you could do. You knew that he would be there for a long time so you decided to take your time getting ready for bed, not bothering to lock yourself in the bathroom this time.

Sitting there on the bed in a tank top and underwear, you did your routine, taking off the bandage and cleaning out the cuts. They were finally starting to heal, but they looked awful. The cuts actually looked worse than when you made them. It hadn't been long since you gave yourself these cuts, probably five days or so ago. You started back up again after a particularly bad mission preceding a nasty fight with Steve about you being reckless.

In that argument, he reverted to his 1940's mode and said something along the lines that women shouldn't be fighting because we are a liability. That was the first time he had ever said something like that. You slapped him and stormed off to your room where you sat there crying, eventually leading to self-deprecating thoughts then to self-harm. You had been clean for almost eleven months at that point. But that broke as soon as Steve started yelling at you.

He came by your room later that night, apologizing. Saying that he didn't actually believe any of what he said and that he was so sorry. Little did he know that it was too late. All the progress you had made with your therapist stopped at that moment.

You digressed. You stopped taking your anxiety medication. You cut almost every night and getting more distant from Steve as well as the rest of the Avengers.

You tried to hide it from everyone and thought you were doing a good job at it, but Tony being the nosy little shit that he was found out. A few days after the incident, you found him at your door.

"What do you want Tony?"

"I want you to talk to someone," he says shoving into your room.

"What are you talking about?"

"The self-harm? The fact that you stopped taking your medication?" He yelled at you throwing his hands in the air.

Slamming the door closed you walked over to him, "how the hell do you know that?"

"I have eyes and ears everywhere. FRIDAY alerts me when signs of a panic attack start. I designed a program to help me notice when the symptoms were occurring, and when FRIDAY notified me that there was a code Stark happening and it clearly wasn't me... I looked through the cameras," he sat down on a chair in your room, "Please tell me what's going on."

"It's none of your business."

"Oh, so I'm assuming Steve knows? He's helping you through this, right?"

"Fuck off Tony. Steve has nothing to do with this."

He tapped a few times on his tablet and pulled up a timeline he made. There was footage from your incident with Steve a few days prior, videos of every time you cut, videos of every time you had a panic attack, and every time you threw your pills down the sink.

"I don't care that you don't tell him. Hell, I don't care that you've been trying to hide this. What I do care about is when someone on my team is killing themselves"

Tony was the reason you started taking your medication again. He drove with you to every meeting with your therapist for weeks. When you relapsed with self-harm most recently, he was there to hold you when you cried. He was like your older brother. He really cared.

This was something you didn't want your team to know about. It was something that you felt would make you seem weak. So he never told Steve, so long as you kept up with your medication and therapy meetings.

You snap out of the daze you were in and realize that you were reopening the cuts by rubbing them so hard.

"Fuck," you press a gauze pad on the cuts to slow the bleeding.

Before you could move, the door swings open and in walks a very sorrowful-looking Steve.

"Listen, Doll. I'm really sorry. I don't know why I said that but I-" He stopped talking when he saw you, "are you alright?" He rushed over to you when he sees the blood-soaked pad on your leg, attempting at pulling your hands away from the sight, "let me look at it."

"Steve get off of me," you say pulling away from him.

"Were you attacked?! What happened?! Let's get you out of here. We have to move you to a safe location!" He grabbed your arm, attempting to pick you up. He was getting ready to run.

"Steve!" He turned to look at you, face full of concern, "I'm fine."

"What happened?" He asks sitting you back down.

"It's nothing, don't worry."

"I'm going to worry! I walk in here and my girlfriend is bleeding!"

Seeing his worried face made the anger you felt melt away slightly. You sigh, "let me get changed, and then we can talk." After putting on clean nightclothes with a half-assed bandage job, you come out of the bathroom and sit on your side of the bed. Steve stood far on the opposite side of the room, leaning against the door frame.

"So?"

You pat the bed, signaling him to come sit down, "please don't get mad at me."

"Just tell me, you're getting me really worried."

"When I was little, I had a hard time in school. It caused me to have a lot of... well, problems. My parents were worried about me and brought me to the doctor when I was almost eleven. The doctors diagnosed me with depression and anxiety. I've been seeing a therapist for fourteen years now... to help with my self-harm and suicidal ideations."

"I don't understand," his brows were furrowed, head tilted to the side.

You laugh at his puppy-like expression, running your hands through his hair, "When I was sixteen I tried to take my life. It wasn't the first time nor was it the last, but it's been a while since the last time I tried," you bite your lip, avoiding eye contact. "I was clean for almost a year. But after our fight last month I regressed- which is not in any way your fault. I wasn't in a good place anyway."

You were shaking, the start of a panic attack starting, "Tony figured out what I was doing. He took me to every one of my therapy sessions to make sure I was actually going. He also made sure I was taking my meds."

"You're on medication?"

"Yeah."

You both sit there in silence. Your brain going a million miles a minute with the different ways that this scenario could play out. Would he leave? Would he say that you're a freak? Would he want nothing to do with you? You didn't know, and the anticipation was freaking you out.

"Deep breath, Doll. You're shaking," he pulls you into his chest, rubbing circles onto your back. After a minute of him calming you down, you sat back up. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want to bother you all. I didn't want to be seen as weak."

"You're not weak. I don't understand a lot about mental health- it just wasn't something we knew a lot about in my day. But I want to be there for you."

"I know," you look down at your lap and notice there is blood seeping through your pant leg, "Goddammit." Jumping out of bed you go to your suitcase and grab your small bag, heading to the bathroom.

You turn around when you hear a pleading Steve, "Can I help? Please?"

"Yeah, sure."

Steve follows you into the bathroom where you take off your pants, soaking them in water to remove the bloodstain. Feeling his arms around you, you let him pick you up, placing you on the bathroom counter. His hands reach for your thigh slowly, as if not to scare you off. He unwraps the bloody bandage throwing it in the trash before looking at the cuts on your leg. 

"Are these the ones from our fight?" He asks tracing the older scabbed cuts on your thigh.

Shaking your head, you take his hand in your own, "not these. The ones from our fight healed weeks ago... it's not your fault though."

He's silent for a moment, "Is this why you have been so distant recently?"

"What do you mean?"

"Whenever I would try and- um fondue with you, you always jumped away almost like you were scared of me."

"Yeah, I didn't want you to see them and freak out."

"That's kind of a relief. Every time you pushed me away, or wouldn't let me near you... I thought you were scared of me. Or- maybe you didn't want to be with me."

"That's ridiculous, I love you so much. There's no reason why I wouldn't want to fondue with you," you let out a small giggle at the word.

"I started thinking that you wanted to be with someone closer to your age, not someone ten- well a hundred and ten years older than you."

"I don't care how old you are Steve. I love you so much," you grab his face, pulling him in for a kiss before letting out a small laugh, "just so you know... when you had your alone time in the shower today, the only thing I could think about was joining you. I was all hot and bothered." 

He smiles against your lips, "me too." Pulling apart, you grab out the disinfectant wipes and start dabbing the cuts. Steve pulls your hands away and starts doing it himself.

"You don't need to do that Steve. I'm fully capable."

"I know Doll. But let me do this for you," he focuses on the areas where there was the most blood, stopping the flow. He grabs a skin-colored, waterproof bandage and puts some Neosporin on before placing the bandage over the cuts. "There."

He pulls you off the counter and brings you to the bed. Laying you down, he goes back into the bathroom to clean up before changing into night shorts and coming into bed.

You both snuggle into each other before falling asleep.

The next day was much of the same, except Steve made you feel more comfortable in your skin. He made you come swim with him, saying that no one was looking at the bandage on your legs. He said that if anyone were to say anything, that he would go all Captain America on them. 

The two of you spent the day cuddling, kissing, and telling each other how much you loved the other. Steve dragged you back to that store and made you try on that dress, saying that he didn't care if your scars showed. That you were too beautiful to hide behind clothes. 

He was so sweet to you. All-day he took care of you, even skipping his daily run to take care of you. It was sweet but you knew he was itching to get some training in, and forced him to go run before the sunset. He pecked you on the lips and said he would only be an hour.

You took advantage of that time, you felt bad for making him think you didn't want to be intimate with him because of something he did. So while shopping, you secretly bought a few things that you knew he would enjoy later that night. 

Going around, you lit some candles in the room, turned on some soft music, and brought out a new pair of lingerie for him. When he came back he jumped in the shower before anything else as he always did. And when he came out, he smiled and jumped on the bed.

The two of you had a lot of fun. Moans filled the room for a majority of the time. The sun had set long before you two were done.

"I love you," he says, pulling you under the covers and into his arms.

"I love you too."


	3. Tony Stark | Headlines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and his reader girlfriend struggle with the gossip columns causing body image issues for her.

Tony and I have been dating for a few months. We were still relatively new, and for the most part, it was great. We would go on dates, watch movies together and cuddle on the couch in the tower. He was still an ego-maniac but he started toning it down once I called him out one day on a date. 

We had our occasional fight. They usually occurred after I would drag him out of his lab, but they never lasted long. He would come to my room later and apologize for being a jerk, saying that he was stressed and took it out on me when I was just trying to help. 

Dating Tony was amazing. You might think that it would be all about the expensive dates and flashy toys, but in reality, we had the most fun together when it was just the two of us. Of course, he still buys me flashy things, but I usually make him return them. It's not my style. 

The only major downside was the paparazzi. 

I am a doctor. I worked with Dr. Helen Cho and many others on treatments that could help the human body heal faster. My work is what got me transferred to the Avengers tower. I worked hard and always did whatever I could to help out. With all the lab work I do, you could say I wasn't used to being in the public eye. 

Tony told me not to read anything online, but when you are dating one of the most famous men in the world your name comes up a lot. The headlines are written to get you to read them, and it worked well. And as they say- curiosity killed the cat. 

Headlines like "The truth behind Stark's new girl" and "If (Y/n) can do it so can you" and "Stark's standards have dropped!" were popping up everywhere.

Of course, they were all ridiculous, but they made you read. 

None of the articles were positive, and after reading dozens of news pieces about what is wrong with your body over and over again, it gets into your head.

We were lying in his bed, my back towards Tony. I have my own room, but Tony insisted that I slept with him instead. He says that having me near him helps calm him down, and reduces his nightmares. 

But it was hard to fall asleep with everything that the gossip columns say running through my mind. It all got to me after a while. I started hating my body. My hair, my eyes, my stomach, my thighs, all of me was repulsive. So when Tony wanted to cuddle at night, I pushed him away.

"What's wrong baby?"

"Nothing Tony, just go to sleep."

"Fine but I wanna cuddle..." he throws his arm around my waist and pulls me closer to him. Tony nuzzles his nose into the back of my neck and relaxes. His body pressed against mine and I could feel his warmth radiating off of him. I tried to fall asleep but those articles kept popping into my head.

'Tony Stark's new girl is definitely not his usual style.' 

'Maybe he hit his head while fighting.' 

'She's definitely a downgrade from his last fling.'

I throw his arm off, "Tony stop."

"Why?"

"I- I'm all bloated..." 

"I don't care baby." His fingers trace up and down my side.

"Well, I care."

He sits up in bed, looking down at me, "Have you been reading the gossip columns again?"

"It doesn't matter," I mumble into the pillow.

"You know that they're bull shit! Baby common. I just want to hold my sexy ass girlfriend in my arms and sleep."

Ignoring him, I curl tighter into a ball and scoot further to the edge of the bed.

"Baby..." Tony grabs me and pulls me further onto the bed. 

He crawls down the bed, trailing his hands down my sides. "I fucking love your body," Tony mumbles as he crawls under the sheets. "I love these beautiful thighs," he kisses both of my legs. "I love your beautiful stomach," another kiss placed near my belly button. "Your beautiful hips," more kisses. "Your chest," a kiss between my breasts. "Your hands," he starts kissing my hands. "Your arms," he places multiple kisses up my arm to my "shoulders" and my "neck." "Your adorable face," he places kisses on my cheeks, nose, and forehead. "Your hair," he places a kiss on the top of my head. "But most importantly I love you." He cups his face with his warm hands. "I love how you don't put up with my bullshit, how you love me for who I am, how smart you are, how kind you are to others... I love you."

"I love you too Tony."

"Now can we cuddle? I can't sleep without you in my arms."

I let out a small laugh, "sure baby."

"Goodnight (Y/n)."


	4. Peter Quill | All You Had to Do Was Ask

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter and his not-so-much friend with benefits reader work through not wanting to be friends with benefits anymore.  
> Female reader

"Fuck Quill!" (Y/n) moaned out as her legs shook.

My release followed her a minute later before I collapsed on the bunk next to her panting body. We lay there for a moment catching our breath.

(Y/n) and I have been hooking up for a while now. Ever since S.H.I.E.L.D. gave the order, she has been flying with the guardians. Her fun and laid-back personality meshed well with our little group. Needless to say, she caught my attention fairly quickly.

"Alright, up and out Star-Lord. I need some beauty sleep." She rolled onto her stomach, folding her arms and resting her head in them.

"Can I at least put my pants on first?" I laugh, sitting up.

"I'll allow it," her response came out as a soft giggle as she watched me pull on my clothes. After covering up I grab my remaining clothes that were scattered across the floor and head for the door. I stop at the sound of her sleepy voice, "thanks for indulging me again Quill."

"Anything for you babe." And with that, I step out of her quarters and close the door. Leaving her room after hooking up was always bittersweet. On one hand, I'm getting laid. On the other hand, it's just getting laid. As I finish pulling on my shirt, I bump into Gamora.

"Another fun night with (Y/n)?" She asks with a smirk on her face.

I roll my eyes and finish pulling putting on my belt, "How'd you know?"

"I'm going to grab a bite. Want to join?"

"Sure."

Gamora and I were together before (Y/n) came aboard. Even though we really liked each other, our relationship didn't last. We broke up mutually, deciding we weren't right for each other.

"So are you two getting together?"

"I don't think so..." I say, sitting down on one of the stools. 

"You want to though, right?" 

"Hell yes, I do. But she doesn't want that, and I'd do anything for her."

"Even drive yourself crazy?"

"Look, this is what she wants. And it's not like I'm not getting anything out of our arrangement. I'm just happy that she's happy."

"I call bull shit," Gamora says in a singsongy voice. She tossed me some space food and sat down. "Quill, I see how this has been affecting you."

"And just how has this been affecting me Gamora?"

"You're obsessed with her! You follow her around like a lost puppy! Not to mention you're at her beck and call."

"Yes, we both know that I really like her. What's your point?"

She leans across the small table and grabs my hands, "Peter, you know I care about you, I want you to be happy. (Y/n) is the best thing to ever happen to you, and I don't want you to let her go because you were too scared."

"I'm not scared."

"Cut the macho man act." 

I roll my eyes but give her a small smile, "So what do I do?"

(Y/n)'s POV

Over the next few days, it seemed like Quill was avoiding me. When I came by his cabin for another stress relief session he said no. This in itself isn't big deal, but when paired with him avoiding me altogether, I got concerned.

It was annoying, but I put it off. He was probably upset over something small and would be back to normal in a few days.

Our next stop was at a planet called Troyihines. The planet was similar to Earth, the surface was solid but underneath was water. As we approached our docking point, Quill pulled me to the side.

"Want to explore a bit? I heard that the surface is a lot like Earth's."

"I didn't know we were talking again."

His hand flew to the back of his neck and he let out an awkward chuckle. "Yeah... sorry about that. I've had a lot of things on my mind for the past few days." His excuse obviously a lie, but I let it slide. "So... exploring?"

"Sounds fun. Is Gamora coming?"

"No. I was thinking just you and me."

I look at him for a second, trying to decipher what he meant, "Alright."

After Quill was sure that the Milano was getting fulled and repaired, he took a quick trip out to the local town saying that he needed to grab a few things. He met me back at the ship and we went out exploring. The two of us walked for a while before Peter spotted a grassy spot under some tree-like structures. He opened his backpack and pulled out a blanket, spreading it across the ground.

"You know, if you wanted another round we could have done it on the ship." I kneel in front of him and start unbuttoning my shirt.

"Whoa, hang on there (Y/n)." He re-buttons my shirt before pulling two sandwiches like snacks from his bag. "I was thinking we could have a picnic, like the ones on Earth."

"Oh, that actually sounds nice." I grab one of the sandwiches held out towards me and started eating. "Did you get these when you went into town?"

"Yeah, I figured that they would have similar foods to Earth since the planets are similar." He took a bite of his sandwich and smiled, "I was sick of space food."

"Well, we should definitely stock up before taking off again."

Quill and I sat in the shade talking about everything from our lives on Earth to our hobbies, to our teams. It was a really nice conversation, and I felt like I actually got to know him for the first time. 

"You know... I was surprised when you asked me to go exploring with you. But this was really fun."

"I'm glad. I've wanted to get to know you for a while now. Outside of sex, I mean."

"That's fun too."

"There's no question about that," he lays down and looks up at the sky. "I've been meaning to talk to you about something..."

"Sounds serious."

Quill lays there for a minute, thinking over whatever it is he wants to say. "Do you think we could try being more than friends with benefits? It's fine if you say no, I just really like you and wanted to at least ask."

I think his word over for a moment, "sure."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I like hanging out and talking to you. Plus we're already sleeping together. So why not?"

"That was nowhere near as difficult as I thought it would be," he laughs, looking up at me with a smirk on his face.

"Is this the reason you've been avoiding me for the last few days?"

"Yeah. I was thinking over dozens of ways to bring the topic up."

"All you had to do was ask me, Peter. You didn't have to do all this you dumb ass."

"What? You don't like romantic gestures?" He asks in a mock offended tone.

"I'm just saying that I would have said yes even if it was after sex or something." I lay down and snuggle up against his warm torso. "But I do love the Earth picnic. It was really sweet of you."


	5. Thor Odinson | Your Crimes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This story contains sensitive topics of abuse, please don't read if that makes you uncomfortable.  
> The reader is female and is NOT being abused by Thor. But Thor does find out and does something about it.

It was at one of Tony's parties where Thor first noticed. It was the little things things that Wyatt did that bothered the Asgardian. Things like grabbing your arm, constantly needing to be touching you, and how aggressive he became when other people talked to you.

Your POV  
Wyatt and I have been dating for a little over five months. He and I met at a local Starbucks after he accidentally spilled his drink on me. We started talking, and after a week of texting, he asked me on a date.

He was so sweet, always texting me first thing in the morning and right before he went to sleep. We spent as much time together as possible. After every mission, he would take me out on a date and we would cuddle at his apartment for hours. We were in love. But three months into our relationship he started changing. The first time he hit me we were in the middle of an argument. It was just a palm to the cheek, but it stung. He immediately apologized, kissing and hugging me, saying that he was so sorry. That he would never do it again.

I believed him, he promised it would never happen again. But over time it started happening more and more. He started pushing me around and grabbing me. Hitting became more common, but he always apologized after. So I stayed with him. I needed him.

He didn't want to come to the party, but I begged him. I told him that we wouldn't stay for long, and we could go up to my room afterward.

Well, he was sick of being at the party, and he was making sure that I knew it. He pulled at my arm, "Let's go (Y/n). I don't want to be here."

"I know, but Tony wants me to stay a little longer."

Leaning down, he whispers into my ear, "I don't give a damn what Tony fucking Stark wants. I want to go and you are not staying here by yourself."

"I promise that it will only be another half hour," I say placing my hand on his in an attempt to get him to loosen his grip on my arm.

Instead of letting go he tightens his grip, fingers digging into my skin, "you have fifteen minutes. Any longer and you're going to regret it when we get upstairs."

"O-okay," I nod my head and lower my gaze, hoping to keep things from further escalating. Finally, he let go of my arm, walking towards the bar to get another drink. Taking a breath, I close my eyes. I stand there for a moment attempting to regain my composure.

"Are you alright Lady (Y/n)?" I look up and see Thor's newly discolored eyes looking down at me, full of concern.

"Oh Thor, hi. Yeah, I'm fine. Why?" I ask biting my lip.

He looks at me with his brow furrowed and places a hand on my cheek, "I just thought-"

"(Y/n)!" I flinch at the sound of Wyatt's angry voice.

"Sorry, Thor- I have to go." 

Thor called after me, "Wait! Lady (Y/n)-"

The elevator ride to my room was quiet, but I knew by the way Wyatt was standing that it wouldn't last long. As soon as my bedroom door was shut, his rage opened up.

"You fucking whore!" I felt his hands on my back, shoving me, "Is this what you do when you go on missions?! Huh?! You fuck other guys?!"

"No- Wyatt I would never do that to you!"

"Don't fucking lie to me! You go around spreading your legs to every guy who asks, don't you!" Before I could protest any further, I was face down on the ground. "You know (Y/n), you're the reason I have to keep doing this. If you would just behave then I wouldn't have to punish you."

"I swear! Please I don't know what I did wrong!"

His fist flew towards my face, "I saw the way he looked at you!" 

After the first blow, I started seeing spots and decided to close my eyes. I could feel him hit me over and over again, each time being harder than the last. The last thing I felt was a hard kick to the ribs.

. . .

The muffled sound of Steve's voice came over the speakers, "All Avengers to the training room in five." Immediately pain shot through my head, and I winced.

After Wyatt had left and gone home, I was in so much pain that I couldn't move. As soon as he shut the door, I passed out on the floor. There was no way I could make it through a full day of training, not after last night's ordeal.

"FRIDAY?" I croak out while dragging myself to the bathroom.

"Yes, Miss (Y/n)? How may I be of assistance?" comes FRIDAY's voice through the speakers.

"Can you tell Cap that I can't come to training today?" I look into the mirror seeing the bruises littering my arms and my newly split lip. Not to mention my left eye all red and puffy from crying, paired with my right eye now sporting a very dark shiner.

"Of course, I will relay your message to the Captain."

Turning on the faucet, I step out of last night's clothes and into the shower. I let the warm water roll over my tense muscles, relaxing slightly. After a moment of enjoying the warmth, I started washing my hair and body. As I scrub I wince at my tender ribs.

"Fuck." The left side of my torso was black where Wyatt kicked me. 

I turn off the water and wrap one of my fluffy towels around my torso. Looking back at the mirror I run my fingers through my hair before walking back into my bedroom.

"Lady (Y/n)?" I nearly shit myself at the sight of Thor sitting on my bed.

I pull my towel closer to my chest, "Thor! What the hell are you doing in my room?!"

A blush passes over Thor's face and he clears his throat before speaking. "Steve told me to check on you since we were supposed to train together. Clearly, it is a good thing that I did," he crosses the room and places a hand on my cheek like he had the night before. His thumb softly rubbing below the tender skin under my eye. "What did he do to you love?"

"It's fine Thor. It was an accident." I say pulling my face out of his hold.

His voice lowers, "That is a lie. I have seen the way your boyfriend treats you." His eyes were storming but his face was tender, "On Asgard, he would be executed for such crimes."

"We are not on Asgard, and it really isn't a big deal."

"Do you see the bruises on your body? No man should treat his lover like this."

"It's not as bad as it looks."

"I doubt that. By the number of bruises visible on your face and arms alone..." his hand softly skims down my arm. "Did he do all this?"

He was looking down at me with such concern in his discolored eyes. I knew he would get angry if he knew the truth, so I lied. "No, he didn't. You should leave."

"Not until you tell me what happened."

"Thor, I'm serious. You barged into my room without my permission. And here you are, invading my personal space while I am only wearing a towel."

"Lady (Y/n) I do apologize for being intrusive, but I-"

"There is no but Thor! None of this is your business!" I pull out of his grasp. "We are just having a rough patch... that's all." I pull at the top of my towel attempting to hide more of my exposed skin. "Train with Nat. I'll give Steve a call later. For now, just tell him that I'm sick."

. . .

It only took a few days for the bruises on my face to fade enough that I could hide most of them behind makeup. Others still hadn't healed, but hiding them behind clothes was easy. As for my lip, I told people that I busted it training. Everyone seemed to believe my story, which worked well in my favor. Less than a week after the incident, Tony was throwing another party. Wyatt and I had made up after a few days, and he agreed to come to this party with little struggle. 

We were an hour into it and everything was going well. I was wearing a black, knee-length, long-sleeved dress that looked cute but covered all of the bruising on my body. Wyatt was talking to some of my S.H.I.E.L.D. colleagues with his arm securely wrapped around my waist. After finishing another drink, he leaned down and placed a few sloppy kisses on my neck. "How 'bout you go and grab me another beer sexy?"

I nod before walking across the room towards the bar.

"Hey, Sam," I say leaning against the counter. "Stuck on drink duty tonight?"

"Yep. What can I get for you (Y/n)?" He smiles.

"Could I get another beer for Wyatt?" 

"Course you can."

I take the drink from Sam and give him a small smile before heading back to my boyfriend. "Here you go, baby."

Wyatt snatches the beer from my hand "God you just can't help yourself can you (Y/n)!"

"What do you mean?" I ask, taking a small step back.

"All you had to do was get me a fucking beer and you go off and flirt with the guy!" He takes a swig from his glass, "you're such a fucking slut!"

People were staring at us, "I wasn't baby, I swear..." I quietly say, in hopes of calming him down.

"Now your lying to me!?" He rears his hand back and I squeeze my eyes shut, bracing for impact.

"Lay a finger on her again and I will break your arm." 

I open my eyes to see Thor holding Wyatt's arm mid-swing.

"Shut the fuck up." He pulls out of Thor's grip and yanks me to his side. "She's my girlfriend, I can do whatever I want to her!"

Wyatt was pissed off and pulled me tighter to his side. Unfortunately for me, his fingers were starting to dig into my bruised ribs. I tried to not show any reaction but shortly after, thunder roared overhead. "I told you not to touch her."

Thor grabbed Wyatt by the collar and ripped him off me. "The only reason you are still alive is because we are on Midgard. On Asgard, your crimes would not be forgiven so easily." Thor towered over the smaller man, "(Y/n) is a kind and beautiful maiden, I will no longer sit aside and watch you take advantage of her kindness. If you ever come near her again I will not hesitate. Do I make myself clear?"

Wyatt doesn't say anything, he just nods frantically and runs out of the room.

If people weren't staring before, they were now. I stood there in shame. I'm an Avenger for crying out loud, there was no reason for Thor to step in like he did.

. . .

Not long after I ended up in med-bay. Thor spilled the beans on my bruises to Banner, which lead to him wanting to check that nothing was severely damaged. I was sitting on the examination table in my bra and under armor shorts, while Bruce checked for other injuries. After seeing my ribs he decided to call in the team captain. 

When Steve came in, he was pissed. He demanded to know what was going on between Wyatt and me. I tried telling him it wasn't a big deal, but Thor stepped in.

"I would not call the way that boy treats you no big deal. On Asgard-"

"Enough! I don't give a shit what you or anyone else thinks about my relationship!" tears started to slip from my eyes as I continued yelling. "Wyatt loved me! And now because you couldn't keep the fuck out of my business I am alone again!"

"Lady (Y/n)..."

"Fuck off Thor!" I jump off the examining table and head for the door, "stay out of my business!"

"(Y/n)." Thor grabs my wrist and turns me around, "the things that he did to you were not the actions of a person in love. Love is looking out for the other person and lifting them up. Not tearing them down and harming them," he brings his hand up to my cheek. "I know you can take care of yourself, but I love you too much to let him continue to hurt you."

"You what?" 

The color drained from his face and he stepped back. "I- I am sorry I did not mean to say that." 

"We will give you two a minute. But (Y/n), we will be talking about your condition later." Steve and Bruce stepped out of the room after I nodded my head.

We stood in awkward silence for a moment. "Thor..."

"I am sorry Lady (Y/n). I should not have said that at this time. That was improper."

"No, you are right. Wyatt doesn't love me. I know that he doesn't. I just felt so alone and he made me feel like I had someone..." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair.

"You are not alone love. Everyone on this team cares deeply for you." His arms wrap around my waist and picked me up, carrying me back to the examination table. After setting me down, he pulled off his green jacket and put it over my shoulders. "I care about you. Seeing how much he hurt you made me furious. If you need someone for any reason come to me. Or Steve. Hell, even Tony is better than that piece of shit." 

"Thank you..." I tilt my head up and look into his eyes, "about what you said earlier-"

"Do not feel pressured to return my feelings. I understand that you do not feel the same."

"Thor-" My response became cut off as the doors opened.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but I need to finish examining (Y/n)." Bruce said with an apologetic smile.

"Of course." Thor steps back and heads towards the door, "I've taken up enough of your time." And with that, he walks out of the room with a nod to the Captain, who was coming back in.

"How are you feeling?" Steve asked as he stood near the table.

"Like I was kicked in the ribs," I laugh awkwardly.

"How did this happen (Y/n)?"

"Well his foot came down on my-"

"You know that's not what I meant."

I bite my lips and sigh, "I just didn't want to fight anymore. It became easier to just take the hits."

"(Y/n)..."

"I know."

We sit there in silence as Bruce clicks away on his computer. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but your ribs are broken." Bruce looks up from his computer, "you will have to take it easy for the next few weeks."

"I figured it was something like that..."

Steve let out a sigh, "this is not ideal. But you are off missions until you are fully healed." He grabs my hand, "take this time to figure out what you want to do about Thor."

My eyes widen at Steve, "I don't-"

"Take your time (Y/n). I know he cares about you, so he will wait for your answer." 

. . .

Over the next few weeks, I did exactly that. I thought about what I wanted. While I was doing this, Tony had Wyatt arrested. Steve filled him in on what was happening and Tony pulled up the security footage from that night. Banner submitted his medical report and with all the evidence, the bastard was put away. 

I was upset at first, but I knew that he deserved it. 

The paparazzi caught wind of the news and blew it up. 'How could an Avenger be assaulted?' was the question that people had. I decided that it was important for me to put my side of the story out, so I posted a video on the Avenger's social media. I talked about how even though someone may be physically stronger than their abuser, emotional manipulation plays a large part in many abuse cases. I talked about how this can happen to anyone. How I felt it important to talk about so people going through this know they are not alone. That this can happen to anyone, even an Avenger.

Thor was with me every step of the way. He helped me write out what I wanted to say in the video, he helped me clear my room of Wyatt's things, and he (along with the rest of the Avengers) sat with me during the court case. 

He respected that I wanted to take time to think things over. 

And over the weeks, my feelings for him grew. I really liked him. I think I had always liked him, but throughout the weeks of healing, it became obvious.

"Can we talk?" I asked Thor during another one of Tony's parties.

"Is everything alright lady (Y/n)?"

"Everything is fine, Thor. I just wanted to talk to you about something." He follows me out onto a balcony and we sit next to each other on a lounge chair. "I want to give you an answer."

He gives me a soft smile, "to what?"

"That day in Bruce's lab you said you loved me." I grab his hand and play with his fingers, "well I feel the same way."

His whole face lit up, "are you sure?"

"Very much so. You've been so kind to me over the last few weeks, and I really like being around you." I look up into his mismatched eyes, "I love you, Thor."

He leans down and presses his soft lips against mine. "To use Midgardian terms... (Y/n), will you be my girlfriend?"

"I would love to."


	6. Sam Wilson - Art Project

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A female reader is an artist who needs a canvas, but it definitely becomes more fun.
> 
> The art described in this is something I want to do in the future, it's a vision I have had in my head for a few years and want to depict on my own.

'Your final assessment: Use a singular colored medium to create a unique piece showcasing the human emotion that you feel is the most complex. You may use any medium you desire and may use any form of media to showcase your work.'

I close my laptop, and flop back against the couch, "Well fuck."

"Language." 

"Sorry, Steve..."

"What's going on," He asks, pausing the show he had been watching.

"I just got my final assignment."

"What's it say?" I re-open my laptop and show Steve the email my professor sent out. "Well, that's not very descriptive."

"That's my problem!" 

I'm an art major in my senior year of college. You may be wondering why a college student is hanging out in the Avenger's tower with the Captain America. Well, that's because I'm a Stark. My cousin Tony took me in after my parents died when I was young. He's kind of like a father figure to me. 

"Do you have any idea what you want to do?" Steve asks.

"Well, the assignment says the most complex human emotion... so something about love?" I pull up a new document on my computer to take notes, "maybe something about the confusion between love and lust... which means I should do something around intimacy." Tapping out my ideas on the computer, I continue, "lust is often associated with red, love with pink... but I want something different. Maybe yellow? What's the symbolism behind yellow...?" 

I pull up the google definition, "Let's see... 'Yellow, the color of sunshine, hope, and happiness, has conflicting associations. On one hand, yellow stands for freshness, happiness, positivity, etc... but on the other, it represents cowardice and deceit.' That's perfect!"

Pulling my sketchbook out of my bag I start sketching randomly as I talk, "I could show the places a body is touched during sex... the conflicting placements on a body... oh I would need someone to model..."

I jump up off the couch, grabbing my things, "thanks for your help, Steve!"

"I didn't do anything!" Steve laughs as I bolt out the door to my room to plan.

After a few hours of writing things down, I had come up with a plan. I was going to use yellow-painted handprints on a model's body to show the different places someone would be touched while bring intimate. The model would be standing in front of a mirror looking at the marks left on their body, and this would be captured through a picture. 

All I needed now was a model, and I had someone special in mind... Sam Wilson.

"Please, Sam! I promise that you would remain anonymous!"

"I don't know (Y/n)..."

I had pulled Sam aside after dinner that day and told him about my idea. 

"Please? You're the perfect person for this!"

"And why is that?"

"B-because..." I tried to come up with an excuse that wouldn't make me sound weird. Cause a girl can't say 'the idea of touching you so intimately makes me supper fucking turned on.' Oh yeah... did I mention that I had a thing for him? 

"Because what?" He says crossing his arms.

"Because... because the contrast of the yellow paint would look so good against your skin!" Biting my lip, I continue talking out of my ass to cover up my blushing cheeks. "I was thinking about asking Steve or Bucky but the picture wouldn't be as pretty!"

"Oh, so I wasn't your first choice?" He smirks down at me.

"N-no! That's not what I-"

A small laugh escapes his mouth at my franticness, "I'm just messing with you."

"So you'll do it?"

"Sure. But I want ten percent profit when your work is sold in the future."

It took me a few days to get all the materials and set up my room for the picture. I was organizing my paints again when Sam knocks on my door frame. "Don't you look cute?" 

Looking down at the paint-covered denim overalls and loose, long sleeve shirt I had pushed up to my elbows, I roll my eyes at him. "Uh-huh."

"So what do you want me to do?" Sam asks, standing in the doorway.

"Well, I wanted to go over a few things with you. Make sure you're comfortable with the process."

Sam steps into my room and sits down on a chair across from where I was standing. "Alright."

"So as you know the picture is going to be of you um- mostly undressed. You can wear shorts if that makes you more comfortable! But um..."

"Sugar, I'll wear whatever you see in your vision. I'm comfortable in as much or as little as you want."

"Okay... well in that case- do you have a pair of black boxer briefs you could wear?"

"Ooh smart. You want to show off my toned physique." A smirk stretches across his face, "Yeah, I can do that. What else?"

"To get the handprints I'm gonna have to... you know..."

"Touch me?"

"Yeah, that."

"No problem there. Anything else?" 

"Well, the whole idea is that the model- you- is looking at the marks left behind and debating whether the connection between you and the girl is love or lust."

"That's a really cool idea." He leans towards me, placing a hand under his chin, "I have one question though."

"Shoot."

"Why yellow handprints? Wouldn't red be better?"

"Well, I wanted to do something new. And yellow has two different connotations. The typical happiness and hope which I'm using to portray the love and on the other hand deceit or cowardice, which portrays lust. If the marks were pink then it would obviously be love. Red would clearly show lust. But yellow is less straightforward, it could be either emotion."

"Wow, that's really deep. I'm impressed."

An awkward laugh escapes, "thanks." I walk over to my layout and open the paint bucket, "how about you go get ready and I'll finish setting up?"

"Sure thing! I'll be back in five." 

After a few minutes, I had the paint laid out for easy access and Sam came back into my room wearing a loose shirt and baggy pants.

"Is it okay if I change in here? I didn't want to walk down the hall in just my boxers."

"Yeah, that's fine. My bathroom is-" Turning around, I choke at the sight before me. Sam was shirtless, pulling down his pants, leaving him in a pair of tight, low-hanging black underwear.

"You alright there?"

"Y-Yes!" I stutter and turn around, pushing my hair behind my ears. Taking a moment to breathe normally, I pull my hair up into a loose ponytail before turning back around. "Alright. Let's get started!"

I turn on my music playlist and dip my hands into the paint. The song I Feel Like I'm Drowning by Two Feet comes on, and I let out a laugh. 

"Well, this is fitting. I guess this will help you get in character."

I reach out with a paint-covered hand, waiting for some sign of permission to touch him. When he nods his head, I place my hand on his cheek. Goosebumps formed on his skin at the contact of the cold paint.

Moving my hand, I placed it on his chest. His heartbeat picked up, pounding against my palm. I left it there for a moment longer than necessary, relishing the feeling of being close to him. Next, my hands move to his biceps in a few different places. I avoid looking into his eyes as I let the paint set. 

I step away from his warmth and re-cover my hands with the cold paint. Crouching down, I place my hands on his muscular thighs, then his hands, and up to his broad shoulders. 

"I have another question."

Without looking away from my paint-covered hands, I let out a small grunt, signaling him to ask.

"Is this where you usually touch a guy while fucking?"

"When he's on top of me, yeah." I place my hand back in the paint, "now shut up and let me work."

Standing in front of Sam, I wrap my arms around his torso. Pressing my fingers onto his back I drag them towards his chest, around his ribs, making sure my palm prints are visible from the front. 

"Ooh, so you're kinky in bed."

"I will hit you."

"I wouldn't say no to that sugar."

"Sam..." 

"Sorry, sorry."

Adding a few more handprints, I rub my hands on my overalls and grab my camera. "Alright, so if you want to stand in front of that mirror I will set this up."

After a few minutes of setting up and moving things around, I finally took the photo. A few adjustments later, the picture was exactly as I imagined. The angle allowed all the yellow handprints to show on his body, and it allowed me to get a really cool reflection of the city skyline through the mirror. All I have left to do is some slight edits, which I would do later in Photoshop. 

I couldn't help but flip through the dozens of shots I'd taken and just smile at them.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I yell, running to give Sam a huge hug.

"How'd they turn out sugar?"

"They're perfect!" Letting go, I grab my camera and show him the pictures.

"Wow, I didn't expect them to be that good." 

"Wait till I have a little bit of editing done. I want to make everything black and white except you and your reflection!"

Sam lets out a small breath, "God you're amazing."

"Um- thanks."

"I mean it," he steps closer, bushing a stray strand of hair behind my ear. "You're smart, talented, and beautiful. Even covered in paint." 

Sam takes my hand in his larger one as he presses his lips to mine. His lips were soft against my own. He looped his arms around my waist, pulling my body flush against his. 

"How about we see where those hands really go?"

"O-okay." His fingers reach for the buttons to my overalls, letting the fabric fall into a pile on the ground. I pull of my shirt, dropping it with the denim on the ground. Turning around I see him seated on the edge of my bed, eyes full of lust.

"Damn you're sexy." He grabs me by the elastic of my purple panties and pulls me towards him. His lips find mine again as my body presses against his muscular frame, I reach around and unhook my bra, tossing it behind me. 

Sam grabs at my newly uncovered chest, playing with and pinching one of my nipples. A moan escapes my lips at the new sensation. Leaning his head down, his tongue lapped around my other bud, playing with me as I squirm in front of him.

"Saaaam."

"Fine, fine." He detaches himself from my body and lays me down on the bed, removing my underwear and his own before hovering over me.

I reach my hand down and give his cock a few strokes, listening to his breath hitch. As my hand moves along his shaft, he starts playing with my dripping core. His fingers rub small circles around my clit before pushing one in. After working me a moment, he pushes in another. His fingers move in a scissoring motion, stretching my entrance.

"Please just fuck me," I whimper, needing more of him.

"Anything for you sugar." He pulls his fingers out, grabbing my hips and lining himself up. My hands grab onto his shoulders as he pushes in. I let out a moan at the feeling of him filling me up.

"God, you're tight."

He lets me adjust for a moment before pulling out and thrusting back in. He was slowly pulling out each time, but he would thrust in harder and harder until he was pounding into me.

My legs wrap around him, heels pushing him in harder each time he thrust. He shifted slightly, causing his tip to hit the perfect spot inside of me.

My nails raked down his back as the coil in my stomach starts twisting. His grip on my hips tightens as his rhythm becomes sloppy. Every movement he made added to the immense pleasure building in my body. 

His hand moves from my hip down to my clit, drawing sharp circles around the bundle of nerves. The added pleasure was just enough to push me over the edge, legs shaking as my body clenches around him.

"Fuck- Sam!" He continued his thrusts, working me through my orgasm.

"Shit-" He pulls out and cums on my stomach with a few quick pumps. Sam collapses next to me, chest heaving. 

We lay there a moment before he grabs his shirt and wipes his cum off my stomach. 

"Your beds all yellow now."

I laugh, pulling him down to kiss him. He pushed a lock of hair behind my ear and lay down, pulling me up against him. "Thank you for helping me with my project."

"Of course, I love seeing you in your art mode." His lips press against my shoulder, "I have one more question though."

"What is it?"

"Did you only want me as your model because I'm black?" He mumbled against my shoulder.

"Partially. I mean yellow paint wouldn't show up on someone with whiter skin... but honestly, I just wanted to be able to touch you..." I could feel him smile against my neck at my answer. 

Sam traces his fingers along my arm for a moment, basking in the afterglow. "How about next time we see where you leave your marks when on top?"

I flip over, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "I'd love that."


	7. Steve Rogers | With Him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not all endings are happy endings.  
> A female reader deals with Steve's choices.

He just sat there. He sat on that bench talking to Sam acting like nothing was wrong. Like he didn't leave everyone. Like he wasn't hurting me.

He was no longer the same, he was older. He was wrinkled and grey, but I knew it was him the moment I saw him sitting there. None of us moved. We stood there staring at his back. Sam eventually gained the courage and stepped forward.

"Cap?"

His voice came out softer and more fragile than I had ever heard him, "Hi Sam."

He shifted in his seat, no longer looking at the lake in front of him. As soon as he turned, his smirk was visible to all of us. Even though he was older, it was clearly the face of the man I fell in love with all those years ago. The man who held me in his arms each and every night, whispering in my ear. The man who kissed me with so much passion. The man who said he loved me. 

I stood there for what seemed like hours but was really only a few minutes. I watched as Sam picked up the shield. I watched as they shook hands, Steve placing his left hand on top of their conjoined ones.

A small gold light reflected off their conjoined hands. realizing what that light was, I felt my heart shatter. The light had reflected off a simple gold ring wrapped around his fourth finger. 

He left me. He chose her after promising he would be with me no matter what. 

"You wanna tell me about her?"

He let go of Sam's hand and turned back to the lake, "no. No, I don't think I will."

I hadn't noticed that I was crying or that my legs had given out until I was clinging to Bucky's tear-stained jacket with his arms holding me up. 

I clung to him, desperately trying to stay silent. Steve didn't know I was there. He didn't see me, and I wanted to keep it that way. I didn't want him to see how much he hurt me. I knew how happy he was and I didn't want to get in his way.

He had lived the life he always wanted, with the girl he could never get over. Nothing I could do would ever change that. But at that moment my world fell apart. Everything we had gone through over the last ten years together amounted to nothing. Every conversation we shared, every night spend cuddling until we fell asleep, every date, every kiss, every time we made love... it all meant nothing to him. 

The man I had devoted my life to didn't want me anymore. 

With that realization, I wiped my tear-stained face and pulled myself from Bucky's grasp. Standing up, I took one more look at the man who I thought would be with me and left. 

For the next few weeks, I cried. Every night I cried in the bed Steve and I once shared. I cried over my dead best friend, I cried over my dead father figure, and I cried over the man who said he loved me. 

Then I started drinking and partying. Every night I would go out and get myself plastered, only to bring home whoever would sleep with me. I numbed the pain as much as I could. Bucky and Sam tried to stop me. They tried to help me through the pain, tried to convince me to talk to him, but I wouldn't have it. I shut them up in every way possible. 

After a year I had calmed down. I wasn't happy, and I sure as hell wasn't over him, but I wasn't destroying myself as often. I moved out of the tower, getting a small apartment in New York. The few remaining Avengers visited me occasionally, but I no longer worked for S.H.I.E.L.D. I got a simpler job working in a library. It wasn't glamorous, but it paid the bills and kept me busy. 

I stayed there for another year, enjoying the simple life as much as I could. Every once in a while I would slip back into my bad habits. Sometimes it lasted as much as a month, sometimes only a few hours. Sometimes they would be so bad that I couldn't get out of bed. I would just lay there and cry until I passed out.

One day after coming home from a shift at the library, I found Bucky sitting at my door. 

"Hey, Bucky. I gave you a key, didn't I?" Unlocking the door, I ushered him inside. 

"You did. It just didn't feel right going in without you here."

I put my bag down and pulled my shoes off, "so what's up?"

His hands were shoved in his pockets, "you might want to sit down."

"Are you okay?" 

"Yes- no- I don't know." his metal fingers card through his newly short hair, "look... Steve is dying."

"Oh..." I step away, sitting down on the nearby couch. Bucky follows, sitting next to me.

"I know you want nothing to do with him, and I don't blame you for that. But he wants to talk to you."

"I don't-"

"Just talk to him. I know you, and you'll regret not talking to him. Please?"

"When?"

"The doctors say he won't last long." A tear slides down his usually stoic face. "What he did hurt us. And I will never get over what he did, but he's still my best friend..."

"I have a day off tomorrow. I'll go then."

"Thank you."

I spent the rest of the night pacing. I was terrified of going to see him after all this time. What would I say? What would he say? I slept for an hour or two, but it was sporadic. I kept waking up crying or being unable to breathe. When it was finally time to get ready to go, I looked like I felt. Shity. The dark circles under my eyes could only be hidden with makeup so much. 

Bucky decided to drive me there, and as we dove past the hospice my stomach started twisting in knots.

"Pull over."

"We're almost-"

"Pull the fuck over!" Less than a minute later I was throwing up behind a bush next to the pale yellow building. "I'm sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry about."

After emptying my stomach a few times, Bucky brought me inside. I was standing outside an old wooden door, looking at the letters on the nameplate. Steven G. Rogers was written in all caps below another name I didn't care to read. 

Bucky had sat in the waiting room, saying he would give me some space. I couldn't find it in myself to open that door. It seemed too complicated. Behind that door was the love of my life, dying after choosing another girl. But I have to see him, no matter how much it hurt. I had to think through each motion I was so stressed. 

Lift my hand and place it on the knob, twist, then push.

When the door was finally open, I stood in the entryway, looking at the cream-colored walls and white curtains flowing as the spring breeze pushed past the open window. 

"Hey Doll," a frail version of Steve laying on a bed called out to me. He beckoned me over to a chair near the side of his bed and I followed. Even in his old age, he still had the authority in his voice that made you do whatever he wanted. It was just in a softer tone.

He was thin, his skin had become brittle and his veins could be seen from under them. He wasn't attached to any monitors. Bucky told me earlier that Steve didn't want to be reliant on a machine for his last few days. It was scary seeing him like this. He was once this strong and cuddly man, now it seemed like he would break in the wind.

We stayed silent for a while, me unable to open my mouth, and him just looking at me.

"How are you doing?"

I shrugged my shoulders in response. I didn't meet his eyes, scared that if I did, I would break down.

"I was surprised you agreed to come Doll."

"Please don't call me that."

"I'm sorry. Old habits."

My fingers trailed against the soft fabric of the chair, "why did you want to see me?"

"Because I don't have very long left, and I wanted to see you before I go."

My eyes stung and my chest burned. The love of my life sat there talking to me like I was an old friend. Like all the time we spent together meant nothing. 

"Please don't cry. I lived a good life, and I'm ready for what's to come."

I could only nod my head in response. He didn't get it. To him it had been eighty-plus years, to me it had barely been two. He left me alone after saying he loved me. And he never apologized. I wanted to scream at him. I wanted him to know how much his abandonment hurt everyone around him. How much he broke me. 

But he wasn't going to be around long. I didn't want his last moments to be full of hatred. So I kept my mouth shut. 

We made idol conversation, stopping occasionally when he had to catch his breath. I didn't have much to talk about, so I listened to his stories. Steve talked about what it was like when he got back to the '40s, about what it was like knowing what was historical moments were going to happen, and about what she was like. He talked about her a lot, how happy he was with her. 

Sometime during our conversation, he grabbed onto my hand. He didn't let go, not while talking about his life and not while he closed his eyes. I listened to him breathe while he slept, unable to make myself leave. No matter how upset I was, I loved him. I loved him more than I have ever loved anything in the world.

For an hour I stayed there, holding his hand, watching his chest rise and fall shakily, just looking at him. 

And eventually, I watched him take his last breath.

I didn't move. I couldn't move. My world, my broken and battered world, died with him.


	8. Bucky Barnes | Soulmates B937621

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This story has sensitive content around mental health.   
> A female reader and Bucky Barnes interact in a place you wouldn't expect.

Soulmates. The person you are destined to be with. Everyone when born has their soulmate's number on their right wrist and your own number on your left.

Back in the '40s, my soulmate number was different than those around me. My soulmate had eleven digits and four letters. Everyone I knew had six numbers and one letter. My own was number, B937621. It always confused me, why was my soulmate's number different? 

That question was answered when I realized I was in a new century. After coming to terms with what Hydra did, taking away my own number, I started thinking about my future. The people from this century had longer soulmate numbers, and it made me think. Would my soulmate even want me? With all the things I have done in the past, who would want to be my soulmate? I'm a monster.

The team was sitting in the lounge around the coffee-table, talking and playing games on a rare day off. As the group joked and laughed around, I sat back and watched from the fancy couch across the room. Taking another sip of beer, I laughed at Thor's antics from afar.

"Hey, Bucky," Wanda said as she sat on my right.

"Wanda."

"How come you aren't sitting with the group?"

"I know not everyone is comfortable around me. Plus I like just observing." I take another useless sip of my beer.

"Well is it alright if I stay here with you?"

"Be my guest."

We sat there for a while just listening to the team make fun of Steve for calling out 'language' when Natasha swore.

"So how come you're not with the team?"

"My friend was hospitalized again. Drinking just didn't seem appropriate."

I just nodded in response, not wanting to pry.

"I feel like I don't know you. Well, I know the basics but I don't know a lot about who you really are." Wanda crosses her legs and turns to face me. "Tell me about yourself."

"There's really not much to me..."

"C'mon. What were you like in the '40s? What did you want to do with your life? What's your favorite color? There's a lot to know."

I laugh, looking at the curious young brunette sitting next to me. "Well, I kept Steve out of fights or at least finished the ones he started. I was always running around with a girl, usually trying to get one to look at Steve." I finished the last few sips of my beer and put the bottle on the floor, "I don't really know what I wanted to be. I ended up being a Sargent, and a member of the Howling Commandos. That was a fun group. I mean it was tough but they were good guys."

Wanda leaned against her palm, looking at me and smiling. "What about your favorite color?"

"It used to be red, but you know... now I think it's blue. What about you?"

"Red, if you couldn't tell by my outfit," she laughed, motioning to her clothes. "What about your family?"

"Both my parents died by the time I was ten."

"I'm sorry to hear that. I know how awful losing your parents is."

"It was harder on my little sister Rebecca. She was so young at the time... she was put in a boarding school while I stayed on the military base. I met Steve a while later, he wasn't that much different. I mean sure, he was smaller and was sick a lot, but he was the same person that he is today. Just a little bossier now."

The two of us talked for an hour or so. It was really nice to talk to someone about such normal things. I wasn't the Winter Soldier, I was Bucky Barnes. Wanda told me about her life in Sokovia, what her brother was like, and the other things you ask when getting to know someone. 

"Yeah, Bucharest was a great place. I really enjoyed going to the market, even though I was hiding out. I think-"

Wanda suddenly grabbed my flesh arm, flipping it over to look at my wrist. Her eyes were wide as she looked at the numbers on my arm. I didn't fight her, I let her run her fingers over the number before she looked up at me.

"Bucky..."

I didn't know what was going on, so I stayed silent.

"Do- do you remember your number?"

"Yeah, it was in my case file. Steve showed it to me when-"

"What is it?"

"B937621. Why?"

"Have you- did you-?"

"If you're asking if I've met my soulmate before my answer is no."

"Why didn't you-"

"Even if I had met my soulmate they would never have wanted me as their own."

A tear slipped from her eye, then another, and before I could say anything she was sobbing. I didn't know what to do. I didn't mean to make her sad. 

"Wanda I didn't mean to make you upset."

"You didn't do anything." She rubs at her eyes, attempting to stop her tears. After a few minutes her treats stopped flowing, she took a couple of deep breaths. "Tomorrow morning will you come out with me?"

"Um, I don't-"

"Please?"

"Alright..."

She smiles softly and stands up. Wrapping her arms around me she gives me a soft hug before going off to bed.

The next morning I sat in the Avengers common room, waiting for Wanda. I had worn a long sleeve red Henley and a pair of khaki pants, not quite sure what we were doing. When she finally emerged, she gave me a sad smile and we left the facility. We took a car, stopping at Dunkin Donuts. I didn't know what she had planned but I went along with it. She ended up ordering two dozen donuts and hot chocolate, asking if I wanted anything. 

We got back into the car she didn't eat any. She carefully placed the cardboard boxes on her lap and held onto the cup making sure not to spill any. 

We pulled up to the front of a large hospital and Wanda stepped out of the car. I followed her, not really sure what we were doing here. She smiled at the lady behind the desk and continued walking down the halls and into an elevator. It seemed like she knew where she was going like she had done this hundreds of times before.

"Wanda?"

"Everything will make sense in a minute." We continued walking, and then we got to a set of lockers. She placed the food on a small table and emptied her pockets. "If you have any weapons on you put them in here."

"Wanda I don't know if-"

"Please?"

With a reluctant nod, I emptied my pockets of a handful of items I had. I wasn't carrying anything major, just some keys and a pocket knife. She locked the door to the small locker, grabbing the food. 

"Ready?"

I didn't respond, just followed as she stood at a set of double doors. We waited for what looked like a nurse to let us in.

"Hi there sweetheart, how are you doing today?" The nurse asked. She was a tall black woman with short curly hair and a big smile on her face.

"I'm doing alright Jamie. I brought donuts for the rest of the staff."

"Aw aren't you sweet." She opened the first set of doors, ushering us in before closing them behind us. We stood in a small room between the two sets of doors. "And who is this handsome man? A friend of yours?"

"Yeah, this is Bucky. I work with him."

"Well, it's nice of you to visit." The second pair of doors opened and Jamie let us in. "She's in her room drawing."

"Thank you." Wanda smiled and handed Jamie a box of donuts before walking down a green hallway. As we walked through the hall, I saw a few people in different rooms. We stopped before a doodle-covered door and Wanda gave me a soft smile. "I know I haven't explained what we're doing, but I'll explain when you meet her."

Before I could respond, she knocked on the door and a soft voice responded. "Come in." Wanda pushed through the door and I saw a beautiful girl sitting on the windowsill, looking out at the city. The girl had (y/h/c) hair and was sketching on a pad of paper. She was wearing a blue crew neck sweater pushed up to her elbows, black leggings, and a pair of fluffy rainbow socks on her feet. 

"Hey (Y/n), I brought Dunkin and a guest."

The girl (Y/n) turned her head and smiled softly, "Hi Wanda." She had stunning (y/e/c) eyes that hovered over Wanda before coming to rest on me. 

"This is Bucky." 

"Hi Bucky, I'm (Y/n)." She hopped off the windowsill and reached a hand out for me to shake. Slowly I reached my hand out and took hers in mine. 

The first thing I noticed when shaking her hand was the large bandages covering her forearms. Clearly, I must have shown my confusion because she let out a small, sad laugh.

"You can ask if you want." She pulled back some of the bandages and showed me her cut up upper-forearm. "I'm here on suicide watch."

"I'm sorry- I didn't know."

"It's okay. I'm just surprised Wanda didn't tell you."

"Actually, there is another reason I brought him here." Wanda speaks up, "Show him your wrist."

"Wanda..."

"I'm serious (Y/n)"

I watch as her beautiful (y/e/c) eyes roll back in annoyance. "It's not fully healed... and I haven't looked at it in a week." She switches arms and starts to pull off the bandage covering her wrist. She lifted up her arm so I could see her mangled skin. This arm was clearly more carved up. It looked like she was trying to cut her number out of her skin. Her soulmate number was illegible, but bits of the mark could be seen on the healed parts of her wrist. "The stupid number is B937621. I know you can't read it. That was kind of the point of cutting it out." I stared at her in disbelief. B937621. That's what she said. She said my number. 

"Your number..."

"Yeah. I know right?" She recovered her arm with the white cloth bandage and dropped down onto her bed. Grabbing a donut out of the box, she took a bite and looked out the window.

My mouth opened, but words seemed to be alluding me. This girl is my soulmate. After seventy years I found my soulmate. 

"(Y/n)..."

"The whole soulmate thing is fucking stupid. No one has had such a low number unless they are like a hundred years old."

I hadn't noticed that Wanda stepped out of the room until we were silent. It's not like I could tell her that I was her soulmate. She wouldn't want anything to do with me, right? My number was the reason she tried to kill herself. It was my fault that such a beautiful girl didn't want to live. 

"Sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out. Want a donut?" She pushes the box towards me, and without thinking I reached for a chocolate frosted donut with my metal hand.

"Woah! You have a metal hand! That's so cool!" She sat up, eyes suddenly sparkling. "Can I touch it?"

"Um yeah. It's actually my whole arm..." She clearly didn't realize out who I was. I rolled up my left sleeve as far as I could and let her touch my arm. She got all giddy when watching the plates click into place. It was adorable, the way her fingers traced the patterns along the surface. 

"You aren't scared of me, are you?"

"Why would I be? Lots of people have prosthetics." She looked up into my eyes, head tilted slightly to the side. Her attitude had completely changed from just a minute ago, it was like she was a completely different person. 

I carefully pulled from her grasp. I felt like I was lying to her. Maybe if I told her that I was her soulmate she wouldn't try to cut the number out of her arm again. It was worth the shot if it meant she stopped trying to kill herself. Even if it meant she hated me.

Sitting down on the soft matrice next to her, I ran a hand through my hair. "There's something I should tell you."

"Okay?"

I let out a shaky breath, "B937621 is my number."

Eyebrows scrunched together, and frown on her lips, she looked at me trying to piece things together. I watched as her eyes darted from my face to my arm and back again. She repeated this action a few more times before her eyes widened.

"You're James Barnes. The Winter Soldier."

I flinch at the name. I couldn't meet her eyes, terrified that if I did I would see the disgust on her beautiful features. 

"Holy shit." She stood up and paced the room, biting her thumbnail.

"I understand if you want me to leave."

"Why would I want you to leave? For the first time in my life, I don't feel broken. Well- less broken. I'm in the mental hospital for fuck's sake." Her feet still in front of me. "Can I see your wrist?"

I push my sleeve up on my right arm, her soft hand grasp onto my wrist and her thumb rubs over her number engraved in my flesh.

"You really are my soulmate..."

"I'm sorry you went through what you did because of me. You can blame me all you want, but please, promise me you won't try and- get rid of it like that anymore."

The silence in the room was deafening. I could feel her looking at me, but I still couldn't bring myself to meet those dazzling (Y/E/C) eyes. At this point, I was willing to do anything for this girl. If she wanted me to leave and never come back I would do it in a heartbeat. If she wanted to hit me I would let her. I just needed her to do something. To say anything. 

Her voice was soft, almost silent when she finally spoke. But I heard her clear as day. "I don't have a reason to get rid of it anymore."


End file.
